July 19th so to pick up where we left off yesterday i had a 22hr boat ride from italy to tunisia. (northern east part of africa for geographically challenge humans from the united states).  So last night well at like 1 am on the 18th i found a little hidden hallway and a corner right next to a do not exit door on the ship and decided to call it a night.  Well i woke up at 4am freezing they had that ac blasting and i am in a lakers jersey and shorts.  So i wake up and try to find a warmer spot of the boat.  Now i originally was supposed to have a seat in this one theater but the lady at check in pretty much said just find anyplace you like to sleep. Well to find out its because its obvious people are spread across 4 chairs so no way in hell anyone is going to find there seats.  Somehow luckily i did find a open seat and cock her back and passed out.  It did not last long cause those piece of shit humans that people like to refer to as kids starting crying yelling and playing like its god damn recess at school.  I tried to fight it but by 9 i gave up and just got the fuck up and tried to move away from those creatures.  (which its a boat absolutely impossible)   I went outside try to catch some rays but then by noon i felt like I’m probably burning so i did find a place a bit more silent on the boat in this one area where i was able to pass out for a few hours woke up again when those screeching voices came into my radar so decided to get up and finish up my last blog.  I made it through and around 6 i caught the first glimpse of africa.  Went up on the deck to watch us tie in to port and then made

Africa i have arrived

my way down to grab bernard to get the hell off this boat.  Thankfully my bike was parked near the exit so as soon as the cars did move i was able to get out pretty quickly.  Instantly i felt like i was with my people – there is just something about 3rd world countries that you will never ever ever get in the money ego driven 1st world hateful countries.  First thing as soon as i get to immigration the first thing the guy says where you from i said california ( i dare not to say usa even though he has my passport) he does not skip a beat and says i love california welcome to my country your welcome anytime here.  Stamps me pushes me through next is customs now this guy was not as happy cause i did not have a paper he needed.  So asked me why i told him i have this paper he said no go get this other paper.  So i park my bike which is blocking a whole line of cars behind me to go over to this other booth this guy prints out the paper i need for bernard i go back to him the guy smiles and says now your free to go welcome enjoy your stay.  I cruise out and

Tunisia i am so fucking happy to be here

head straight to my hotel.  Now its like 930 at night i think by the time i arrive at my hotel.  they open a side garage for me and i park it down below and get checked into my room.  Now i am hungry and have no currency so i ask the front desk he then runs to exchange money for me only taking 2 euros on a 50 euro bill and suggest i go to this place across the street for dinner.  I grab food and call it a night. July 19th wake up early cause want to get this front tire change on bernard before i do any riding.  I asked the front desk guy and sure enough one of his colleagues gets on a bicycle and rides in the 90 degree weather to find me a place to change my tire.  We stop at one place no luck they just sold tires ( which surprisingly had my damn size and fucking italy i could not even find my tire size by the way hate italy) next stop they said no but pointed up the street to a scooter place.   Now when we get there the poor guy riding the bicycle is dripping in sweat and the dude goes to a store near by and buys him and i a water.  No exaggeration felt so bad for him and yet he had the heart to buy me a water.  Anyways the shop we Pull in takes off the front tire and tells the guy helping me he

bernard gets another new shoe

has to take it back to that other place to actually get it changed.  So the dude takes my spare tire and my actual front rim that has a tire on it aka its heavy and rides it about a block the other direction by himself on a bike to get it changed for me.  In the meantime i am sitting here at the scooter shop and these guys are asking me about game of thrones. personally never saw it and don’t really ever care to but i act like i know what there talking about and we shoot the shit for a a short time till my boy comes back with my brand new tire on my wheel.  The guy at the shop throws it on tightens the bolts and my guy from he hotel and i are heading back to the hotel.  We get back i ask him if i can take him out for lunch but unfortunately even though he was helping me he was not allowed

the guy to the left (or my right) is the one who helped me thank you so much

to take a lunch break.  So i tip him a few dollars for his time.  I then ask where can i grab some authentic tunisian lunch he asked if i had brick or ojja yet i said no.  So tells the guy thats been helping again to take me to there other hotel that they own and order me those two dishes.  So off we go again this time were walking its about 3 blocks down from the other hotel i get in and food is ordered.  Now what came out was god damn amazing i inhaled the food went back to my hotel grabbed bernard and off to do some sightseeing.  We go to this old catholic church first and then to the largest mosque in tunisia and then to some roman ruins.  The ruins were pretty wild i was told about ten years ago it actually use to be a big sauna club.  I really couldn’t even imagine cause the area was

damn white people (roman leftovers)

huge.  Grabbed some photos played with a hawk for a few seconds and made my way south to hammamet a famous beach spot.  Get to the hotel right around 7 and wanted to go to the beach and grab a beer unfortunately it was already last call at the beach but at 8 in the bar i found out it was the african cup (soccer) finale tonight and the bordering country of algeria is in it.  Now when I rolled into town i did notice lots of alegrian flags everywhere and people honking there horns waving flags almost like a parade well now it all makes sense there excited there in the finals.  So i grab a seat and watch the match happen.  Everyone in the bar was rooting for algeria but one person who was rooting for the other team senegal.  Algeria scored in the first 3 mins and took the game from there.  Everyone seem to go nuts out in the streets cars were blaring there horns flashing lights just having a grand old time.  Now i haven’t really drank since spain so i was like you know what I’m going out this night could get reckless.  I end up at some local bar looking a like a complete foreigner by myself.  The guys beside me had the local beer so when the guy asked what i wanted i just pointed to theres.   Well this meant i was getting the same thing they order to so he gave me a bucket of ten damn beers.  So looks like drinking was happening tonight no matter what.  I got ask for some photos with the locals cause they think i look like a famous raper from tunisian called swag man.  I don’t at all by the way he is just covered in tattoos so people think you automatically look a like so and so – anyways what i was getting at is i didn’t have a convo with myself all night cause of my tattoos some people did actually talk to me. July 20th so a lot of this trip has been go go go mainly cause i been to all these countries before and really had no much interest in visiting other places.  Riding through a country and going to small towns is a experience 90% of tourist do not get. So just because i did not see some stupid monument that is hashtag millions of times on instagram does not mean for one second i did not see a city or place.  So when i got here to tunisia my plan was to do some sightseeing and spending time on the beach and today was going to be my first beach day.  So woke up for the first time this trip after 12 rolled over to the beach and just sat there till 6pm.  I swam

paradise in Hammamet

a little had a drink swam some more caught some sun rays and got chatted up by two old birds from tunisia that of course had to talk about the god damn usa and the train wreck in control. I do all i can to move the subject and finally we fall off that worthless news and move onto what the hell am i doing in tunisia.  The beach bar eventually makes a last call and i head to the room to rinse off and grab some dinner and call it a night.  July 21 i continued my way south but first was going to do another tourist day where i would stop in this old town called kairouan.  Apparently this is the 4th most significant city in islam.  I forget the exact numbers but i

the main mosque of Kairoun

think it was like 500+ mosque in this tiny ass town. (o so dangerous for those islamphobia faggots)  So walked through this rad little city which is tiny alleys and no one was really in site.  This guy kinda hitched a ride with me of course for a few euros to tell me about the place and guide me around.  He did take me to this well (i think my illiterate ass spelled that right) a well  that is consider sacred cause the city has no water supply and they use this camel to walk in circle to bring up drinking water up to the surface.  Saw a few mosques tried on a scarf which i refer to as the Dakar wrap based off the guys in the

my new hat ( no you shit bag usa citizen it has nothing to do with religion)

dakar desert who wore it.  After i  got back on the bike to continue my way south to the city of on Monastir.  This hotel in Monastir only cost me 18 dollars a night so far the cheapest hotel of my trip. Check in and hit the pool up for a quick dip.  Now i thought this place was on the beach as well but all i see out front is a rocky cliffs.  So i originally was going to have another beach day the next day but now I’m bummed so I’m like screw it I’m going to head to the sahara desert tomorrow instead.  I get my hotels switched and call it a night.  July 22nd up at 9 am to get the bike packed cause now i have two places i want to see before making the 4hr drive to the sahara desert.  First stop at the fort there in Monastir and once I get up tot he top of this thing i finally see the sandy beach

the fort of monastir

and that crystal clear water.  O well its to late and honestly the beach looked a little to crowded for me anyways.  I grab some photos at the fort and then head over to the mausoleum right next door.  Now i don’t really have the slightest clue who or what this guy meant to the tunisian people but he has a pretty sweet house.  After that grab bernard and head further south to a city called El Jem to check out some roman ruins.  As soon as I roll up  on El Jem you can see this giant freaking amphitheater similar

El Jem Theatre

to the one in rome.  I park the bike in some shade and start exploring this beautiful thing.  Now this thing is around the same era as the one in rome from what i read but the structure is so much better looking in fact they must of just had a concert there recently cause they were cleaning up from it.  Anyways grab some photos learned a little about the use of it kinda the same shit for rich people amusement as people were fighting to death or fighting animals for there life. Next stop went to another little amphitheater that is now in complete ruins.  Which i like to see that instead of having this shit all put back together like it was ijust built this century.  After a short stop there i head into the museum which is right next door to the theater in ruins.  Now the museum from what i gathered was an old roman house or guess more like a mansion with a bunch of corridors and each place had these insanely intricate mosaics.  So they re built the house like how it was and cut the mosaics out of the wall and or floors

this mosaic was insane to me

and re hung them in this museum.  Now i feel like majority of them were re done but if they really are original they were pretty damn amazing.  It was wild even out in the corridors where the left over ruins still are they still have the original mosaic flooring for each room still in tact.  Some were getting pretty bang up and worn but like i said i like to see that cause it looks authentic to me. What was crazier to me that while your exploring the stuff in the museum and outside you were actually walking all over these mosaics that i guess are not as important.  After I was done with the museum I grab some street food grab Bernard and made my way directly west to the city of Tozeur.  Now being the day starts on the east I would go to say that Tozeur is where the Sahara desert starts ( cause its on the east) and ends in the west on the pacific ocean in Morocco as it spreads all across Algeria which is in the middle.  So I arrive at Tozeur around 7ish at my hotel get checked in and head straight to the pool.  July 23rd I wake up sweating my ass there was no AC in my room and I’m in the god damn desert so I make a call to Hotels.com who i use for majority of my hotels if my girl Ashley can not get me a marriott brand hotel and if there is no party hostels in the area.  Thankfully I do use them all the time cause I’m consider a gold member and they refunded me for my two nights at that hotel and relocated to another hotel that was within walking distance.  I wanted to get exploring so i decided I would just check in later.  First stop was heading out to the sahara mtns to do some walking around and head to this little oasis to take a dip.  I get to the place walk to the top of these mtns taking in the views of really nothing.  Just a vast land of emptiness.  I guess i was cruising pretty good cause i did catch up to a family of four with a guide.  So i guess i was heading the right direction at least.  I cruise pass them and carry on up into the mtns and finally spot some palm trees down in a valley so i knew i was getting close.  Made my way down in the valley to this gorgeous clear water but was really only ankle high.  So was stuck in dilemma do i go up stream to find more water or down.  Well down seem easier and i was right about 100 ft was this perfect little water hole about waste deep with a

swim time

tiny water fall.  No idea where this water is coming from considering its the desert but i pop off the shirt and shoes and take a dip.  Hang out there for a good 20-30 mins before the family started to come.  The little water hole was probably about 30ft wide maybe smaller so i got out and let them enjoy it.  I was refreshed put my shit back on and just took a stroll down the street through the mtns which brought me fairly close to where my bike was.  So originally I guess I didn’t have to scale all those damn mtns the first time but being the valley you obviously can not get those views that I was able to capture and really take in the place.  Next stop went to this other oasis that from what I read was home to 400,000 fig trees and in between the trees was peach trees bananas and some other fruits.  So I when I arrived it was pretty amazing to see such a large area covered by nothing but green.  There is tons of little roads throughout this area and of course another water hole.  Now in between these trees your in shade and

400,000 of these fuckers

I’m cruising on the bike so I was not really all that hot so I just took some photos and carried onto the salt flats.  Now me and the salt flats have a bad history.  If you read my south america blog you would know i broke through the salt flats in bolivia and literally had 4 other people get my bike out of the broken acid muddy water shit till i was able to get on my bike only to come to find out it sucked salt into the fuel pump.  So i was a bit hesitant but it is known for having this electric pink water.  I finally arrived to it and yep its exactly how i remember salt flats looking just white with nothing in site as far as the eye can see.  I walk down to it debating if I want to ride on it and right where the salt meats the land it was straight thick ass mud.  So I thought to myself I am good took some photos of a puddle of water i did see which did look pink but in my photo looks like brown o well i saw it nothing really to see and moved onto one of the main attractions of this city.  Now i truly bet a bunch of star wars nut jobs do not even know this but the first few films were actually filmed in tunisia.  Now tunisians really do not know much about star wars and the silly cult adults who live for it but they know its a tourist trap.  So they actually have the sets still preserved all over tunisia. 

star wars nerd out

Tozeur in particular apparently has the biggest set.  So i grab some photos not really all that entertained by it but it did look cool to have something like this in the middle of the desert.  After i surrounded myself by a bunch of sic fi nerds I made my way back to my hotel to check in and get another dip in the pool and thats exactly how it went checked in dropped off my shit and right into the swimming pool i went.  This was going to be my last night here so I wanted to head to Tozeur park where there is these monuments you can climb to the top to see the sunset.  So laid around for about 2hrs and around 7 made my way to the park which was a ten min drive away to catch this sunset.  I will chase the sunset all day some people like sunset but i been that idiot way to many times to see that shit only to be disappointed every freaking time so never again will i waste a night to wake up morning for that shit.  It was nice not one person was up there to bug me even there was a bunch of people below riding the

love me a sunset ( fuck your sunrise)

camels and 4wheelers below.  Caught the sunset and called it a night.  July24 it was time to get back to the beach and my longest ride of my stay in tunisia a 6hr ride to the city of Tabarka which is located at the very north of tunisia right by algeria.  I was making good time i felt and then boom a bunch of locals were protesting and pissed off about something so had the road blocked off.  One of the truck drivers said your a tourist they may let you through so i cruised up and with a car in front of me.  Now i do not understand arabic or french (thats what they speak here) but i do understand angry and these people were definitely yelling and pretty much telling the car in front of me to fuck off you are not getting through.  So i cruise back a bit and park behind this van and ask whats going on.  Guy did not understand me but he did say maybe one hour till the police come and open the road.  Well okay guess i will just sit here but shortly later a car with italian plates on told me to follow him.  Umm okay i follow u as he head in the opposite direction only to drive off road and it look to me as we would just around the heard.  Well after about 30mins

finally some off road (tunisia road have been way to perfect for my liking)

driving off road we get close to the road i can see it but boom a car comes flying up and with about 5 men and like two kids get out and from there message sounds like they say fuck u you are not getting on this  road.  The one angry man picked up a rock and was screaming at the car i followed i was thinking well this guy is just angry he is no professional baseball player he has no 90mph fast ball so i could easily zip right around him and the rock is to big for him to even aim accurately to hit me.  But the car who told me to follow him said follow us theres another way the kids kinda felt remorseful towards me cause kept saying sorry to me.  Im like hey man no problem i was more amazed that many people could get together and stand for something like this.  Fuck no way in hell cunts in the usa would do that shit so i respected it cause they probably had a good reason to be mad i am sure there government probably sucks like mine does .  So I follow this italian plated car where we meet up with a bunch of other vehicles think they can go the same  way we just went.  Once they are explained about the situation they turn around as well.  So now there is a cara van of vehicles mobbing through the desert the guy leading must of been a local farmer that new the land cause he would lead us all through a area by waving us all past and then when we cross he mob up beside us all and lead the pack again.  After about a hour an half of my little offload adventure we do arrive on paved road and thankfully so cause i needed fuel.  So grab some fuel honk and waved to the car that i followed to thank them and pulled into get fuel and some water and ice cream cause cold water and ice cream sounds good.  Finally I did arrive to my hotel in Tabarka almost 8hrs later from leaving Tozeur.   Get checked in and straight to the beach i go.  After the beach i head to the pool bar to grab me a beer and just hang out while the sunsets and in this time a group of friends to the left invited me in there circle.  Now these are the first people that kinda took me into there

friends

circle so this whole trip i only really had one or two beers besides the ten back at the club in Hammamet that i ended up giving away 3 of those.  Anyways had three large beers and the one guy actually bought me two beers as well.  Now this time the sun had set and I was getting hungry and they were heading out.  So i said my good byes and went straight to the buffet.  Now I did not pay for this i know i didn’t so i thought i paid when i go in but nope they just pushed me right in.  So thought maybe i pay after and nope i had my dinner and walked right out the bad boy no charge what so ever.  July 25th my last day on the beach in Tunisia so got up around noon and back to the beach i went.  The day really involved absolutely nothing but enjoying the a few 2$ beers the sun the sand and the ocean.

beach day

 Around 8 after the sunset i called it a night and went back to my room to just relax. July 26th got up around 10 and packed the bike up and headed up to this castle that over looked the beach i was just relaxing on.  Not sure if this thing is permanently closed  or what but unfortunately it was closed when i was there so took some photos from the top and decided to

i became mr fort finder

make my way back to the capital Tunis.  Now I have not wore my riding gear at all this whole trip beside that 6hr day that turned into almost 8hrs because the rides been so easy 2 hrs here and there.  Well on the way to tunis was no different but this time i hit the hottest weather yet with my bike saying 109.2 so being in shorts and sneakers the heat from the motor and the pavement had my legs on fire.  So the drive was only 2hrs but i had to stop so grabbed me a cold water and ice cream again.  Finally arrived at my hotel and being it was my last night i splurged on the hotel it was a marriott brand hotel so with my discount i paid 58$ yep it was most expensive hotel i paid for since spain at the running of the bulls.  Check into my room and straight to the pool i head

its not a beach but i love days like this

again. Lay around till dinner grab the buffet and call it a night. July27th now i have to check out but my ferry does not leave till 3am on the 28th.  So i go down to get a late check out talk to the manager he looks up my room number and see i am under the employee rate (thanks to miss ashley ) and says your family how does 6pm sound.  I was delighted so i head to the pool swim have a beer and enjoy my last day.  Around 3 i head up to my room just to lay around for the next 3hrs and check out at 6 like planned sit in the lobby for the next few hours where i posted some photos on Facebook and then decided to head towards the port cause i wanted to fill the bike up with fuel (since it was so cheap) and grab some street food one last time.  After I eat i grabbed fuel and then go towards to the port there was this u turn where cops were standing so i asked if i can make a u turn there.  It was three cops two were pretty cool to me but one was a cock sucker and wanted my license so i hand him my ID card since i have no drivers license he then ask for insurance.  Well i had no insurance he said no insurance you can not leave the bike stays.  Im like your fucking kidding dude i been here for two weeks i got in here with no insurance I’m a god damn foreigner i didn’t know i needed insurance and if i did where the fuck am i to get it.  i was in and out of argument with this cock sucker for a good 30 mins finally he said i owe a 400 dinar fine which is like 150$ i said fuck you.  He said the bike stays you can go on the ferry and was not having it finally i grab 100$ and say here take this he hands me my passport and i fuck off…  I was extremely pissed i had to pay off the cop literally 5 mins from the port even after i showed him my papers i am leaving but most importantly was mad why i even talked to the fucking cop.  In all my experiences of riding around the world and even in tunisia this is true ( besides that dick) the cops love you they are interested in what you are doing and think its cool.  So i def never expected this cop would be a such a dick but he clearly saw dollar signs.  I try to take everything in comparison the whole time i been in tunisia to fill my bike up has only cost me 10$ yet in europe it costs me a avg of 40$.  So i just try to scratch it off as well i just paid to fill my bike up twice.  And worst yet in my country the bike would of been inpounded which be what 300$ some dollars plus a fine on top of it.  So it is illegal what i do and this is the first time i been caught so it is what it is.  Anyways finally get on the boat this time i have a cabin which only cost 15$ extra so i had a bed to sleep in and good thing cause i was tired so straight to the cabin so i can try to sleep away the next 12hrs till i get to Italy.

good bye TUNISIA you were simply amazing the food the people the culture the religion do not change.